Join a Group
Join a Group
WHY JOIN A MEN'S GROUP?
BELONGING - A men's group can be the foundation of some really close friendships. Many men say that the guys in their group know them more closely than their own families. Others have found that they've learned to trust other men, after years of being wary and uncertain. This sense of trust and belonging developed in the group environment can then spread outwards to their everyday lives.
BEING REAL - A well run men's group is a safe place for men to be real, not only to express what's really going on for them, but to learn from the experience of others who are also prepared to drop their mask and be vulnerable.
Many men were brought up to believe that a real man is macho, in control of his surroundings and unaffected by doubt, guilt, frustration, and the fear of not measuring up. They are often surprised to find that other men also find it challenging to reconcile what's going on inside with their expectations of being a real man.
THE FLIGHT SIMULATOR - A safe and supportive men's group can be a great place to try out new things, or even just to blow off some steam. It's a place where the "plane" can crash without any one getting hurt.
IMPROVED SELF WORTH AND ACCEPTANCE - Men who belong to groups report major improvements in self-worth, self-acceptance and self-esteem, coming from the awareness they get from the other men.
CHANGING HABITS AND OLD PATTERNS - We all have patterns of behaviour that no longer serve us - scripts that are programmed deeply into our "autopilots". And sometimes it's easier to recognise these patterns in other members of the group before we see them in ourselves. The group can not only help with awareness, but also in supporting men through the challenge of changing these patterns, by both encouraging them and holding each other accountable.
BETTER CONNECTION AND RELATIONSHIPS - A solid men's support group will have guidelines and protocols that make it safe for a man (and for the group) to discuss uncomfortable or controversial topics (yes, even sex, politics or religion) without making anyone else wrong. Men then find they can use the same tools to have meaningful conversations that may have previously gone nowhere.
NEW DIRECTIONS - Some men find the personal growth from the group helps them to find or fine tune their passion into a new direction, giving them and those around them a more rewarding life.
SO WHY JOIN A MEN'S GROUP?
• Belong with men who will help you and give you honest feedback.
• Have an authentic connection with others who will support you and celebrate your achievement every step of the way.
• Be part of a trusted circle of men where you can discuss things you might be unable to discuss with anyone else.
• Be challenged and kept accountable to your commitments.
• A safe place where you don’t have to defend yourself or compete.
• A place to have fun and learn about real lifelong friendships.
WHAT MEN HAVE FOUND
"I now stand in my own skin, reaching within, so far from what I've been..." Extract from the poem/rap in the above video. Darren L, Labourer moving into Youth Work, Age 45.
"When I hear the problems of the other 9 fellas in my group, they all seem so simple and the solutions are so obvious, but when it comes to my problems - well they are sooo complex! And then I got it - the other fellas see it the same way too. So all that advice I'm bursting to give them..... well now I just give that to myself - and it works!" -
John C, IT Professional, Age 43.
"I see a counselor or a psychologist every now and then, but this is a whole new level. When I'm talking to a therapist, I often find myself telling them what they want to hear - I want them to like me and see me as the model client - so I end up committing to things I can't deliver on. In my men's group it's different - I don't have to be perfect, and the other guys hold me accountable." - Lindsay J, Personal Trainer, Age 38.
"It's one of the few places in my life where I can just be myself, and share what's troubling me. It took a while but now I realise that when I am supporting my brothers in the group, I'm really supporting myself - and that I am really worth it." - Matthew B, Operations Manager, 24
"I'm now able to accept and even love myself a lot more. Before the group I found I was comparing my wobbly inside with the cool, calm exteriors of the other guys. I've since learned that it's much the same for them. Now I can be real without pretending to be someone else. Another bonus is that I'm now a lot more accepting of others - some things that used to make me angry are now just a breeze. I wish I'd found this earlier in life. - Colin S, Driver, 52
"I've finally learned to trust other men. By feeling safe with the guys in my group, I'm now more approachable, less aggressive and lead a far richer life." Denis O, Business Owner, 39
"One of the best things is that I don't get advice or feedback unless I ask for it - I am just heard. And when I do ask for feedback, it can be priceless. I don't always like what I hear, but it's really helped me see my blind spots and grow into a much better man." Mark D, Student, 47